The more I listen deeply in things, the more grounded I feel in the brand of love given to me. Yes, I see love as a pure gift. We do not earn the right to possess it nor can we demand conformity in order to give it to another. For what is given in reward to conformity is not love, but control. And not one good thing comes from control.
Release yourself from any unnecessary standard−usually placed on you by yourself−holding back the flow of your authentic self; and thus restricting your impact in the world.
Desire & Intent
Unrestricted, you freely honor the reality of desire. This opens the flow toward intent. Desire & Intent now cooperate as one releasing you into your living methodology … where living = flowing and methodology = rhythm:
A flow alive with the rhythm of who you are.
A New Confidence
The more we listen in the flow of impact, which is internal to external, the more grounded we become in a new confidence−which is what those whom we lead, influence, and serve need from us.
Personal purpose brought to a free, aware level composes your contribution in this world. This is your impact individualized by your unique voice.
Voice awareness gives us power to simply pay attention. As we are freed in our own true voice, others find more and more power of authenticity by our presence.
Freed by purpose, you focus through each success and above every failure. Such leadership keeps us in the unfolding story together.
Our unique brand of love is pristine freedom, allowing us to hold opposing truths we find in life−and that become more clear to us as we listen deeply. To hold is not to control. As we hold the freedom of love, we see more clearly, hear more succinctly, and feel with wholeness.
Posted in Ch. 7: Love | Tagged Brand of Love, Ch. 7: Love, Control, Desire, Intent, Story, Wholeness | Leave a Comment »
As a leader it is important to celebrate the collectiveness of each success. Such generous appreciation keeps us energized for the next challenge together.
The more mature you become in your leadership the easier it is to return to a core focus−your purpose−and not lose footing on the slickness of success. Richard Rohr, among others, teaches that we learn much more from our failures than our successes.
He can’t lead after he succeeds. −Bob Dole
I was intrigued by Mr. Dole’s comment. It is not important to identify to whom the words were directed, but to hone in on possible truth.
~ Do you know how to lead after you succeed?
~ And, what does it mean to lead after success?
To me it means to not lose focus: focus on a purpose greater than any single success. For the immature leader it is easy to see “a” success as a well-deserved, personal accolade. Pinning such a badge on one’s lapel causes great damage and limits the energy the leader will need very shortly for the next challenge−and they come along one-after-another in this 21st Century.
In leadership, maturity is less about age and more about practice; consistently seeking knowledge and putting into perpetual practice-learning for impact. True success comes from your purpose-filled focus. In such trueness we find congruency between purpose and outcomes: seeing each success for what it really is and honoring each effort in the specific manner required to position us for the next thing.
The joys of success are not in a moral, but in the journey of the story itself.
Posted in Ch. 6: Focus | Tagged Ch. 6: Focus, Mature Leadership, Purpose, Story, Success | Leave a Comment »
For years, one simple mantra has continually encouraged me to pay attention in ever more caring and accomplished ways:
There is no more present activity than truly listening to another human being.
To be present is largely about paying attention. And to pay attention is to be present without any need to judge, label, categorize, or otherwise “place” what is experienced.
In the streaming interview with the expertly skilled Jim Gudas, I was surprised by the providential ending. At the beginning Jim had introduced me as Leadership Coach, Author, and Speaker in a very flattering tone. At some point (not known to me at the time as the end) I found myself drawn back to his introductory words. I expressed how much I appreciated his words; “But let me explain to the listening audience.”
I am able to speak to audiences because of what writing gives me. I write from what I learn in coaching: and I learn from each and every client and session. So while some may be impressed by the intro, please don’t be. I do one thing and I do it well … I Listen. That’s it. It’s that simple.
Learning to truly listen to another makes you better able to hear your own voice. Learning to truly listen to self allows you to become a more generous listener with others.
Listening, in ever more intent ways, is at the core of my call. And my calling in this world is to love and encourage−and hence my gift in the world.
Listen deeply to your call!
Posted in Ch. 5: Presence | Tagged Encouragement, Listening, Pay Attention, Present | Leave a Comment »
My work of the last 17 years in particular has progressively blessed me with awareness of the power of my own voice. More recently however, I’ve learned the imperativeness of constant and consistent awareness of voice.
It seems without fail that when I am blessed by an individual’s words expressing the impact of our work together, I am reminded of work where voice was in full flow. Where flow means being fully present in the collision, and consequent tension, of desire and intent; and remaining in the presence of the one to whom I offer my voice.
We must find a way to live in the continuing conversation, with all its conflicts and complexities, while staying in close touch with our own inner teacher. −Parker J. Palmer, A Hidden Wholeness
My Living Methodology is the rhythm that is the flow of unique Desire & Intent. There is an energetic resonance alive in this rhythmic stream of authenticity.
Your inner teacher speaks; often very softly.
One must learn to be still to hear this teacher. The teacher speaks in tune with your distinctive resonance allowing you the opportunity to hear true self in a quiet, safe inner space.
At the core of true self is Voice.
Your impact in this world is individualized by your unique voice. Listen to it−deeply: hear it, pay attention to it, and choose accordingly.
Posted in Ch. 4: Voice | Tagged Authenticity, Awareness, Ch. 4: Voice, Desire, Flow, Intent | 2 Comments »
Should you hear a voice telling you to place all your energy externally and to forget about directing any internally, to the inner journey, ignore this voice. It is not your own.
I followed up for weeks before corralling this new coaching client into locking down our first scheduled session. In the message stream where we set the date, he thanked me for following up with him. He also stated, “Personal Development is not always at the top of my to do list. Might need some prodding to keep it there.”
A New Confidence is the result of hard work (diligence) focused inward−as the flow is from the internal to the external. This inner work is selfless (not selfish) as you make yourself better for those you lead, influence, and serve.
A New Confidence is the result of a balance of cycles. There is the cycle of your core values; there is the cycle of key strengths when you are at your best; and there is your Desire & Intent …
… the cycle that forms the infrastructure of your Living Methodology.
Desire & Intent channels your energy into a creative, fertile flow alive with who you really are in the unfolding moments of impact. Listen deeply in the calm of your moment by moment impact in this world. Impact is not just an outcome. It is a consistent collision of desire and intent keeping you in our presence and us in the power of your living, loving flow.
So with my new client, I will use my living, loving flow to prod personal development to the top of his to do list.
Posted in Ch. 3: A New Confidence | Tagged Brand of Love, Ch. 3: A New Confidence, Desire, Intent, Living Methodology | 1 Comment »
Consciousness and awareness employed deliver blessings from the most unexpected moments.
It may have been one of the sweetest things I have ever seen; the look in this little boy’s clear eyes.
We were on a Saturday afternoon walk when our neighbor was driving in and stopped to speak, her precious daughter and son in their safety seats in the back. We spoke to the children and the adults talked a bit. That is when Phillip spoke something to us, eyes fixed somewhere in eternity: “I miss my Grandma.”
Upon realizing the words, and seeing those eyes, our own gaze shifted to Phillip’s mom who told us of her mother-in-law’s unexpected passing.
What connection there is in this child’s life. As I am still connected to my own Grandmother after all these years, so will he be. Phillip’s Grandma is part of who he is as she lived a form of listening that flows in his very soul; and will be spoken to the world for years to come in his own profound desire.
Honor the reality of your desire; Listen!
In this deep, Grandma inspired listening, you allow the vision of intent to cooperate with desire and form a congruent method of release into this 21st Century age of consciousness and awareness.
It will not be Desire & Intent that gives Phillip purpose. It will be encoded purpose leading him in the evolution of his Desire & Intent.
Thanks to his Grandma his own Desire & Intent will unfold into his Living Methodology.
Posted in Ch. 2: Desire & Intent | Tagged Ch. 2: Desire & Intent, Desire, Intent, Purpose, Unfolding | Leave a Comment »
Before you tell your life what you intend to do with it, listen for what it intends to do with you. Before you tell your life what truths and values you have decided to live up to, let your life tell you what truths you embody, what values you represent. −Parker J. Palmer, Let Your Life Speak
It seems her life was being held in measure to a book of values written by the life of her mother−at least the perception of her mother’s life to which she held tight. So tight in fact that it created an irreconcilable tension between perceived standard and authentic reality.
You know those times when a voice speaks something that makes you say, “Ouch!” And then you slide into deeper shock upon realizing it was your voice! Such was the case with the question I posed during one particular session with Susan.
Susan had been telling me in great detail about her mother. As I listened I remember thinking how unbalanced such admiration felt. That’s when I heard it: “Do you think there might be a need to separate your admiration for your mother from your need to be like her?” When I realized that the voice was my own, my eyes quickly scanned for sharp instruments on the table where we had just dined. Fortunately Susan did not try to hurt me. But is looks could kill …
After our mutual shock subsided we talked freely about the intent of the question. Susan began to see the unnecessary standard she had placed on herself; holding back the flow of the authentic Susan. It was particularly powerful when she was able to embrace another question: Wouldn’t it break your mother’s heart if she thought she was part of anything holding her daughter back?
It thrills me to know Susan opened that day to listen deeply and stepped through a portal to authentic reality and unique impact.
Posted in Ch. 1: Impact | Tagged Ch. 1: Impact, Flow, Unfolding, Values | 2 Comments »